Clearly you’ve never owned a cat

Dear dude (presumably) that I got into a heated online argument with,

Cat collars are no more uncomfortable (when fitted properly) than wearing a watch. And just because a cat is an indoors-only house cat doesn’t mean that they don’t need a collar with tags.

Cats can be notorious escape artists, which I pointed out to you. It’s not the owners being “too lazy to look at their own feet” when they exit their dwelling (apartment, house, yurt in the Andes, whatever)..it’s that some cats can and do try to make a break for it any time a door is open. And, no…you can’t always catch them before they get away if they are determined to get out. Cats are fast little demons when they want to be.

And yes, cats can and do escape apartments. Even apartments that are several floors up. They can and do fall out of windows..even ones that are screened. Our old cat, Rumpleteazer, managed to pop the screen windows out of our house (which is only one story) several times when we first moved in until we figured out a way to keep her from doing it. Now, Rumpleteazer being Rumpleteazer, she freaked out the minute she hit the ground and would sit there in the grass crying her fool head off until one of us came and got her.

Collars and tags (presuming the collars don’t get caught on something and yanked off) help a cat get home more easily because they can give information on the owner’s address, phone number and whether or not the cat is microchipped (Tony and Bella are, though Rumpleteazer never was).

Also, most cat collars also come with tinkle bells attached because it’s supposed to help warn a bird or other animal the cat is coming so they can have a better chance of escaping. From what I understand, cats are technically viewed as a invasive species that’s caused the extinction of several different bird species. But since they also catch and kill mice, rats and other harmful vermin, it’s kind of almost a wash.

Seriously dude…have you ever even owned a cat? Because collars are pretty much standard for all kitties, even the indoors only ones. Telling a cat owner that having their indoor kitty wear a collar is lazy and stupid is like telling a dog owner that their tiny floofy dog shouldn’t wear a collar either because it’s a tiny floof dog and therefore should not need one because it’s too small to run away quickly.

No…making the argument that most US homes have a ‘double door’ as you called it and therefore should be escape proof doesn’t hold water EITHER. I know in my own home (and in most of the homes in my neighborhood) we have a storm door and a regular door on the front door. Now, in my house, the storm door is approximately six inches (maybe less) from the actual front door. Going out from the inside, it might be possible to open the storm door and close the front door behind you at the same time, preventing kitty escape. Coming in from the outside, it’s not as easy because you have to hold the storm door open in order to open the front door and push it in. You can’t close the storm door behind you and THEN open the front door..unless you’re friggin Gumby. Which I am not.

And when I try to EXPLAIN all of this to you, telling me you’re not up to reading all of it just makes me think you’re the lazy one because you want to fight with me, but you can’t be bothered to read my well thought out, well written arguments as to why cats should wear collars.

You’re shooting yourself in the foot and looking extremely dumb in the process, kid. I seriously hope that if you ever own a cat and decide not to make him/her wear a collar and they escape, you’re either able to catch them before they get too far off or some kind person finds them and takes them to a vet or other service where they can be scanned for a microchip. You ARE going to microchip your cats, aren’t you?

Shaking my head,

G

 

 

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