Will there be anyone left to speak up?

In Germany they came first for the Communists, and I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a Communist. Then they came for the Jews, and I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a Jew. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a trade unionist. Then they came for the Catholics, and I didn’t speak up because I was a Protestant. Then they came for me, and by that time no one was left to speak up.” –Pastor Martin Niemöller, 1945


Yesterday, like a lot of people, I watched Donald Trump’s press conference regarding the whole Buzzfeed blow up. Maybe Buzzfeed was wrong for publishing the allegations they dug up against Donald Trump because the information is unverified and possibly completely unverifiable seeing as it came from Russia who is sitting over there going ‘Nope. We ain’t giving you SQUAT.” because they have something to gain (Potentially. Probably.) if America’s political situation implodes. I’m not even sure what all of the allegations include..something about Trump paying off somebody and Russian hookers, I think. (Somebody, if I’m wrong, please correct me.) All I know is that Trump seems to really hate intelligence agencies..including our own CIA and FBI and seems like he’s doing his best to not only put his own cronies in charge of them but dismantle them entirely at the same time so that nobody can dig up information about his past that he’d rather keep hidden.

Yesterday, as millions of people watched on TV and through live streaming, he verbally attacked journalists from both Buzzfeed and CNN, screaming red-facedly that they were liars, they were fake, they put out fake news. I don’t trust Buzzfeed any farther than I can throw it for real news but I DO trust CNN. And if CNN’s reporting it, I’m fairly certain that they are doing their due diligence and researching the heck out of the story BEFORE they present it to the public. I’m still not sure, either, if Mexico is supposed to pay for the building of Trump’s great border wall or if we’re actually PAYING them to do it because he kept talking about reimbursement. What the heck was that all about?

Behavior like this from somebody who is supposed to be our president, the leader of our nation, scares me. I’m genuinely scared that those reporters he was screaming at will turn up dead or disappear entirely and that, while he says he has nothing to do with it, Trump will ultimately be behind their death/disappearance. Because he has proven himself to be the kind of man who says “Yeah. You? I don’t like you. You said/did something to make me look bad so you’re just gonna go bye bye now. See ya later.”. Because he can. Because he has money. Because he’s a white guy who believes he has all the power in the world at his feet. Because he not just talks about violence, he inspires it and doesn’t condemn those who do violent acts in his name.

I don’t know how we got to this point. I don’t know how the pendulum has swung so far that THIS..the worst kind of white trash bigoted woman-hating hatemonger..is who we as an American people say we want as our president.

These are dark times in our country. Trump kept comparing the state of our nation to that of Nazi Germany and I don’t think he was really too far off. That’s probably exactly the kind of nation-state he wants..where everything is tightly controlled by one person and their vision is the only thing that is allowed to stand. Where all who oppose his narrow vision are made to suffer because they dared to speak out against him. He may not have as much power as people THINK he has..at least not yet..but he has put and will put into power his cronies and those who think like him so that his vision is carried out to the fullest. And that’s what scares me most. Will he make it OK for women to be raped because “Men can’t help it”? What will he do to black people? To Muslims? Will he lock them up in prison camps? Will he re-instate harsh Jim Crow-like laws and further inflame the racial tensions? Where will it end?

I have black and Muslim friends and family members (my niece is bi-racial). I am legitimately scared for them because Trump is a loose cannon who might say or do anything and has the money and political power to back up whatever twisted idea comes into his warped brain.

I’m not going to let it stop me from living my life and doing what I want to do..but it has made me more cautious. Because I don’t want to say or do the wrong thing that might cause somebody to come down on me for acting or saying or doing something in a “wrong” way. Whatever way that is. I even hesitated about publishing this because I know it’s going to go out into the world and it’s critical of our new president and somebody might read it and go “She needs to disappear. She has wrong thinking.”

1984 used to be one of my favorite books because for me, it was not just a political commentary but escapist horror. Now..the nightmare is real.


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