So, because there are a limited number of electives in high school and they really didn’t know what to DO with my amazingly weird kid, they stuck him in Spanish I. Which I was fine with. We are Texans, after all, and Spanish is a pretty useful skill around here.
One of the things they’re learning about in Spanish class is “Dia De Las Muertes” (The Day of The Dead) which Disney made an awesome film about called “Coco” (seriously. It’s on Netflix. Go watch it RIGHT NOW. I’ll wait.)
Anyway, as part of learning about Dia De Las Muertes, they have to make an ofrenda and give a presentation about it. When my son was describing the project to me, he said he wanted to put HIMSELF on the ofrenda.
Me: You can’t put a picture of yourself on the ofrenda.
J: But why not?
Me: Well, in the first place, in order to be on an ofrenda, you kinda have to be dead.
Me: In the second place, normally you place people you love who have died on the ofrenda, as a way of celebrating and remembering them. You might also put the picture of a movie star or music artist that you loved on the ofrenda.
J: Oh. Well then who should I put on MY ofrenda? I don’t know any dead people.
Me: Well..what about Grampa Gerald? He died when you were two and he was very important to your father and Mimi and especially Pop Pop.
Me: Well, he was your father’s grandfather, like Pop Pop is your grandfather. And he was Pop Pop’s father and Mimi loved him very much.
J: But..I didn’t KNOW him.
Me Well, yes. But it would still be a good idea. You should call Mimi and ask her to email you a picture of Grampa Gerald. She would be very happy if you put a picture of Grampa Gerald on your ofrenda for your class.
J: No way. That would just be weird.
Me; OK. So who do YOU want to put on the ofrenda?
J: Well, it says in the instructions you can put a book character. I’m gonna put Greg Heffly.
Me: (facepalm) Fine.