My son has entered that phase where he’d rather be bathed in acid than take an actual shower.
So this morning, I sat outside the bathroom and set a timer on the Alexa to make sure he actually stayed in the shower for more than 30 seconds. Because if I didn’t, he would’ve let the water run for approximately 30 seconds, thinking that having three whole drops touch his skin constitutes as a shower. Which it does not…especially when you’re a 15 year old boy (well..almost. His birthday is in 2 months. Close enough.) who smells like he rolled in the contents of a particularly nasty garbage bag at the dump.
I could hear him through the door, ranting and raving about how I’m mean, I’m a bully, this is stupid, he doesn’t care if he’s smelly, I’m OMG SO FREAKING MEAN and this is toooooooooooooooooorture. I just sat on the bed and shook my head.
It took all the strength I had not to burst out laughing, too.
He came out of the bathroom, actually dripping wet for a change, wrapped in a towel. “Are you freaking SATISFIED now?”
“Yup. Just don’t forget to put on deodorant.”
Cue more muttering and groaning because OMG that’s SO hard.
Teenagers…can’t live with ’em. Can’t legally shoot ’em either.